Suspect your Spouse is Cheating? Get a Parrot.

parrottalk.jpgIf I didn’t read about it in three different cases, I would have never believed it. Apparently over history, the pet parrot has been a key witness in proving unfaithfulness and abuse in marriage:

November 19, 1937: According to the LA Times, Mr. James J. Reynolds wanted to put his parrot on the stand to testify concerning its knowledge of the domestic affairs of him and his wife by showing that the bird had learned to call Reynolds certain abusive names and that the bird’s teacher could have been none other than Mrs. Reynolds. Superior Judge Brand, however, refused to allow a parrot to testify declaring the procedure was a little too irregular in that the parrot probably could not be placed under oath and furthermore probably could not recall who had taught it anything it might have learned.”

November 28, 2005: Frank Ficker of Freiburg (try saying that five times straight) thought he had it all: successful wife, nice home, and a mistress on the side. But the family parrot, a pro at imitating Frank, spilled the beans on his cheating ways. That’s how Mrs. Ficker found out about her husband’s affair with a woman named Uta. “Hugo always liked to mimic Frank and he could do his voice perfectly,” said his wife. But one day Mrs. Ficker heard the bird repeating something she’d never heard before. “I heard him doing Frank’s voice, but saying ‘Uta, Uta,’” she said. According to DW-World, the unfamiliar word got the wife searching their house where she eventually came across two plane tickets to Paris, one for Frank, another for Uta (who was, evidently, the other woman.) “I kicked him straight out,” she said. “It’s just me and my parrot now.” Divorce proceedings are pending.

February 27, 2006: Argentina - Angry wife Rosella DeGambos got her blabbermouth parrot Bozo to testify in court, who then spilled all the family secrets within a two-hour appearance. “I knew he’d seen everything that my husband Carlos did when my back was turned,” Mrs. DeGambos said in an interview about her bizarre divorce court ploy. “And I knew he had the vocabulary to describe what he’d witnessed. According to Nature’s Corner, the parrot described three “pretty dollies” that Carlos had “tickled” while his wife was away. He also identified the women in photographs, calling them by their correct names. “I used to think that Carlos was a faithful husband but Bozo let me know about a year ago that something was up when I wasn’t home,” Mrs. DeGambos said. “He was using new words, words of love. And he began giggling in a high-pitched feminine voice. He kept saying, “No Carlos, not here,” and things like that. I knew if the lawyers could get him to testify, there was plenty of information they could get from him.” Shown one picture of the 23-year-old beautician Carlos allegedly wooed in his home, the bird shrieked, “Honeybun, I love you.” When Mrs. DeGambos’ attorney asked the bird, “Who loves Carlos?” the winged witness said, “Ruby loves Carlos, Ruby loves her baby.” Coincidently, Ruby is DeGambos’ young and voluptuous secretary. Judge Agusto, let Bozo’s testimony stand and granted the Mrs. her divorce. The first such ruling in the world.

Either way, it’ll be pretty easy to determine who gets to keep the parrot… ;)

Related News:

Divorce goes Hi-Tech

If you enjoyed this post, please consider to leave a comment or subscribe to the feed and get future articles delivered to your feed reader.

Comments

“Angry wife Rosella DeGambos got her blabbermouth parrot Bozo to testify in court, who then spilled all the family secrets within a two-hour appearance.”

I think I would kill someone if I had to sit in a jury and listen to a parrot testify for two freikin’ hours.

It wouldn’t be hard to teach the bird to do that yourself, just to use the bird against someone else. Show him pictures, repeat phrases, the birds pick it up quick.
Any judge that allows this as “testimony” is a moron.

i think jasen’s parrot rattind him out!

I think the lesson we all learned today is if you have a parrot and want to screw the pool boy. . . kill the parrot if he knows to much.

“Aw, that’s such a pretty bird! Polly want a cracker?”

“No, Polly wants to stuff a #$&^%* in your $*&^%$*& mother’s $*(&#&9 while *%(*$ in a $%*(& to your brother’s *$(&%(^$ fiancee, $(*%&$.”

If you couldn’t “swear in” the parrot, I’m pretty sure that “chain of custody” would have to be proven, just as it would be for any other recording device introduced as evidence… unless the cheater’s lawyer was too dumb to make an objection based on that. Heck, if I’d have known I could get away with something like that, I’d teach that sucker to repeat the names of a couple of the guys my ex cheated with, and DING DING I’d be rolling in alimony!

*remembers to never get a pet that could incrimanate me in court*

Not that I am a cheating person, but for other reasons!

[…] Suspect your Spouse is Cheating? Get a Parrot. […]

I’ve been married for 13 years with two young daughters. I recently saw changes in my husband’s behavior. He started going out more after work, constantly texting on his cell phone. When his cell would ring he would jump to get it. He kept telling me it was a co-worker and it had to do with work. I questioned him about cheating, but he denied it. I needed answers and hard proof that my gut feelings were true and I wasn’t imagining it. I ended up contacting AllState Investigations, which are private detectives and do work statewide. Well, to make a long story short, they caught him with another woman in a romantic relationship. Now I have pictures, video and a detailed report of everything that happened. To see his face drop was PRICELESS!!! It was such a good feeling to have physical evidence in my hands that he could NOT deny. Check out their websites www.94truth.com or www.infidelity.com

I have been married for approximately 2 years and suddenly I began to see a change of behavior in my spouse. He started to come home later, distance himself from me, working out more, and I just didn’t know about his whereabouts. I am from new York so I hired North American Investigations, a private investigation firm who handles matrimonial cases. Needless to say, my husband was cheating and this firm got the bottom of it. There website is www.pvteyes.com if you want to check out more information. I am now in marriage counseling and trying to patch up my relationship with my husband.

In some countries, divorce is more common than marriage. That´s the sd thruth. And the state of the union is that every day more and more people are getting divorced.

This is now more than a communication problem. It´s an epidemia. The only solution is professional help and the sincere desire to make things work.

Divorce is hard, but sometimes marriage is harder. In those times you should get a divorce.

Sure relationships are nice and all. But, let’s face it, people CHANGE. Maybe your husband is not the same person he was 15 years ago. People DO change and so do marriages. Simply use your best judgement to determine whether a divorce is appropiate. Sometimes it is the only way to go.

This is really amazing and surprising at the same time.Sometimes a pet could divulge what we have been hiding all along. I think I have to one parrot too at home.

Leave a comment

(required)

(required)