“I need to know what my rights are…”

i met my husband at proabably the worse time one could meet a sig. other. i was going through a very bad divorce (husband left for another woman) he is seven years younger than i but he was great with my kids. i knew he had some issues with depression and i thought we could work on it because i have suffered with the same in the past and i think everyone deserves a chance. i did fall very much in love with him. we had a son together who is now a year and a half. prior to meeting him i already had three kids with my ex husband so i had my hands full. when he moved in i compramised a part of myself spiritually because i am a christian and i personally believe one should wait until mairrage to live with the person they want to share their life with. we tried to behave ourselves, it didn’t always work that way. we married in may of 06 and we knew of eachother for about a year or more before that including the time we dated. it was a prettey short courtship considering i was going through a divorce when we met even though my ex and i had been seperated for more than a year. my husband has been waiting on his disability to come through so he hasn’t been working hardly at all. i support him in what he’s trying to do i do believe he is someone who needs to be on it because he would even get pannick attacks while in a working environment. our problem here is we are expecting our second child together and he only helps me with the one we have now when it’s good for him. i get up very early every morning to get the other kids off to school and then i have to stay up with our son because my husband always has a reason why he doesn’t feel like helping or says he can’t. every time i beg him for help we argue for the most part. i am now seven months pregnant and i also have grave’s disease. sleep is very crucial to me and half the time my nerves are so bad i can’t sleep at night. i have told him if he doesn’t start helping me it’s over. not because i don’t care about him. i don’t like the idea of being alone but because it’s almost like taking care of another child half the time. his family doesn’t really seem to mind that i pull the load around here. his mother makes exscuses for him (not all the time) but for the most part like he’s a child and i should be taking care of him because i’m the older one!?…….before i met him i was living where we live now, together. i recieve section 8 (gov’t assisted program) i can’t get this man to understand or help me in the morning especially. he sleeps until his hearts content and when he gets up and i’m tired out of my mind from lack of sleep and having to do so much he gets up only to critisize me for what hasn’t been done around the house while he was asleep!….he says i can’t make him leave but all he does is holds on to all the money (money that belongs to our family not from him working, we recieve help from the gov’t) and even though my name is the one on the voucher for sect. 8 he says there is nothing i can do to make him leave because he won’t leave his son. he is mean. he does what he wants when he wants…………….i need to know what my rights are. everything is in my name but he insists it’s “ours’ because were married even though he does NOTHING. please help me……some advice??


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I hate to be the one to say this, but it seems like you seriously need to grow a set and speak it. I know, it is scary and I know that being pregnant at this point and also have a toddler would be very dangerous, but he’s a bully.

Married also means that he would have had to contribute something to the marriage and raising of the child. Doesn’t seem like you can do that and sleep all day also.

There are plenty of us out here that had to grow a set. Personally, I started slowly and built up my own means, after he realized what I was doing, he knew it was time to concede.

Good luck.

I want to know what my right are as a foreign woman who has married a man that just live in the US for about 10 years. I am a legel resident of America, and many times he threaten me by his power. He told me many times to leave the house while I do not have friends or family around here to help me. I do not have a job yet because I take care of his 2 children. I have sacrified so much just for him. For instance; leaving my kids, family and friends in my origin country and so much more. That all has no meaning in his eyes, while I am taking care of his kids just for him. We are married for 3,5 years. Can you tell me my rights as a wife?

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